Honor System Adoption. Please
do not abuse this privilege. If you take this cute lil guy home
with you or you share it with your friend be kind and include
our URL and link our logo to this site.
Other graphics on this page are not available
to take from this location. Please visit the Home Sweet Home
website to obtain this web set.
This adoption is for personal web sites ONLY! Our adoptions are
not available and may not be used by commercial web sites at this
time. Only family friendly sites with absolutely no adult content
who give credit on the same page to graphic artists may adopt.
Folks must have a valid URL with content and not just links.
Sorry, No under construction pages. Please remember to link the
certificate back to our site using this URL: https://medonnabp.tripod.com/
Right Click to save to your own hard drive. Thank you Kindly
Animated
Oil Change
Instructions for Women
1) Pull up to Jiffy Lube when the mileage reaches 3000 miles since
the last oil change.
2) Drink a cup of coffee.
3) 15 minutes later, write a check and leave with a properly
maintained vehicle.
Money spent: * Oil Change $20.00 * Coffee $ 1.00 *
Total $21.00.
Oil Change Instructions for Men
1) Go to auto parts store and write a check for $50.00 for oil,
filter, kitty litter, hand cleaner and a scented tree.
2) Discover that the used oil container is full. Instead of
recycling it properly, dump in hole in back yard.
3) Open a beer and drink it.
4) Jack car up. Spend 30 minutes looking for jack stands.
5) Find jack stands under kid's pedal car.
6) In frustration, open another beer and drink it.
7) Place drain pan under engine.
8) Look for 9/16 box end wrench.
9) Give up and use crescent wrench.
10) Unscrew drain plug.
11) Drop drain plug in pan of hot oil: get hot oil on you in the
process.
12) Clean up mess.
13) Have another beer while watching oil drain.
14) Look for oil filter wrench.
15) Give up; poke oil filter with screwdriver and twist off.
16) Beer.
17) Buddy shows up; finish case of beer with him. Finish oil
change tomorrow.
18) Next day, drag pan full of old oil out from underneath car.
19) Throw kitty litter on oil spilled during step 18.
20) Beer. No, drank it all yesterday
21) Walk to 7-11; buy beer.
22) Install new oil filter making sure to apply a thin coat of oil
to gasket surface.
23) Dump first quart of fresh oil into engine.
24) Remember drain plug from step 11.
25) Hurry to find drain plug in drain pan.
26) Discover that the used oil is buried in a hole in the back
yard along with drain plug. (IDIOT!!)
27) Drink beer.
28) Uncover hole and sift for drain plug.
29) Discover that first quart of fresh oil is now on the floor.
30) Drink beer.
31) Slip with wrench tightening drain plug and bang knuckles on
frame.
32) Bang head on floorboards in reaction to step 31.
33) Begin cussing fit.
34) Throw wrench.
35) Cuss for additional 10 minutes because wrench hit Miss
December(1992) in the left boob.
36) Beer.
37) Clean up hands and forehead and bandage as required to stop
blood flow.
38) Beer
39) Beer
40) Dump in five fresh quarts of oil.
41) Beer.
42) Lower car from jack stands.
43) Accidentally crush one of the jack stands.
44) Move car back to apply more kitty litter to fresh oil spilled
during step 23.
45) Beer. 46) Test drive car.
47) Get pulled over: arrested for driving under the influence.
48) Car gets impounded.
49) Make bail.
50) Get car from impound yard.
Money spent: * Parts $50.00 * DUI $2500.00 *
* Impound fee $75.00 * Bail $1500.00 * Beer $25.00
Total-- $4150.00
But you know the job was done right!!!
